August 26th, 2025 | 4:00 PM MST
Written By: Teresa Milner | Senior Wealth Management Advisor with Pearl Capital Management
Life has a way of reminding us that we’re not in control of the timeline. You can plan, you can prepare, but often the timing doesn’t happen as we expect. Life changes often arrive uninvited, unplanned, and inconvenient – and yet, with support and courage, the unexpected can open the door to something beautiful.
My daughter gave birth to her firstborn prematurely. Oliver’s arrival was a reminder that life doesn’t ask for permission before it changes course. Preparation matters, but flexibility is also essential.
This lesson echoes what many women experience in divorce. Divorce is rarely something “planned”. It arrives suddenly and disrupts the life you thought you were building. You then are required to step into a future you didn’t anticipate. Navigating divorce demands emotional resilience, logistical adjustments, and the strength to move forward during undesirable circumstances.
That’s why it’s so important to stay informed about what’s happening in your household – financially, legally, and even emotionally. Too often, women find themselves blindsided because they weren’t aware of the family finances, accounts, or long-term plans.
While you may not “plan” for divorce, staying informed is a way of preparing for life’s “what ifs.” The below-listed habits do not mean you are planning for a death or divorce; they simply ensure you are informed and empowered, no matter what life brings.
Here are a few practical ways to stay informed:
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- Know Your Numbers: Understand your bank, investments, retirement, and credit accounts, plus household income and expenses.
- Keep Key Documents Handy: Tax returns, insurance policies, wills, property deeds, etc.
- Build Your Support System: No one should go through this alone. Seek out trusted professionals, a financial advisor (CDFA), therapist, attorney, mediator, and personal allies who will advocate for, encourage, and uplift you.
- Stay engaged: Be part of financial decisions, keep an account in your name, and monitor your credit. Don’t leave all the decisions to your spouse.
Here are some lessons I carried from that hospital room that also apply to life’s transitions:
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- It rarely happens when we feel “ready.” Big changes don’t ask for permission. They arrive, and we adjust.
- Preparation matters, but flexibility matters more. Even the best-laid plans can’t eliminate surprises. What carries you through is the ability to bend without breaking. With divorce, that may mean gathering documents and surrounding yourself with the right support team.
- Support changes everything. Don’t navigate divorce alone. Build a team of trusted professionals and loved ones who can help you find your footing.
- Something extraordinary can emerge from the unexpected. Divorce can feel devastating at first, but it can also open the door to freedom, peace, and a new, beautiful kind of life you hadn’t imagined.
When life doesn’t go as planned, we’re reminded that strength is found not in controlling the timeline but in how we respond to it. If you find yourself going through an unexpected life change, we invite you to connect with one of Pearl Capital Management’s financial advisors. We’re here to help you navigate life’s transitions with clarity and confidence.
*This article was written by Teresa Milner, CDFA, a Certified Divorce Financial Analyst, who specializes in helping women navigate through divorce and into the next financial chapter of life. For more information, email her at CDFA@thepearlcapital.com.
